One of the hardest things about being so tired all the time is the dryness in prayer that comes with it. In this time of waiting and suffering, it is so important to me to stay closer to Christ than ever before. But it seems like every time I try to sit down and pray, I can't even formulate words or thoughts because I am so exhausted. During a harder day about a month ago I went to my room and tried the best I could to pray. I knew it didn't have to be profound--I just wanted to cry out to Him in any way I could. I needed some consolation. I needed my time with Christ. I knew that even if I couldn't pray with my words, I could pray by simply placing myself in His presence. So that's what I did...

   

         I turned on the song Oceans by Hillsong United and began to listen and reflect... It was as if Christ was holding me in His arms. We were out on the water. Not in a boat though--you know how Jesus likes to roll... He was standing in the middle of the ocean, holding me in His arms, and we were in the midst of a terrifying storm. Waves crashing all around, lightning striking, rain rushing down... I knew I was in His embrace, but every time I looked around, all I could see, all I could feel was the storm. It was all around us, it was overpowering. Even when I closed my eyes I couldn't ignore the thundering waves crash so close, feeling their mist hit my face. This is how it is in my life: when I encounter storms, Christ has never failed to come running to me when I cry out. But even when He is so close, the storm doesn't disappear... And even when I am in His tightest embrace, when I don't keep my eyes on Him, all I see, all I feel, is the storm. Even though I am not swept away by the waves, it still over takes every part of me, filling me with fear. And the longer I keep my eyes on the storm, the bigger it seems...